#they did have chemistry i will give them that much
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The Commissioner had said that the boy looked exactly like him. It was true, physically, but there were marked differences as well. Bruce studied him as Alfred was gently taking blood for testing.
Danny looked tired; it was likely that he'd been traveling for days, perhaps longer, but he didn't have a bag. Hopefully, he'd dropped it somewhere to retrieve later, but it was also possible that he'd been unable to gather resources before coming to Gotham.
It did beg the question of how he expected this to go. Did he intend to take a DNA sample and leave? Did he have a way of stabilizing himself, or would he return to his creators with the new sample and ask for their help? What traits had he 'failed' to present that they had expected? The number of unanswered questions aggravated Bruce. How much education had he received? Had data simply been uploaded, as with Kon?
But more than tired, Danny looked withdrawn. He shied away from Alfred, and the curious gazes of the Bats that had been spared from patrol. (Spoiler and Red Hood were still out.) His gaze was lowered, his shoulders hunched, like a shamed child. Danny seemed to lack the rage Bruce had exhibited at that age; in its place was a kind of defeat, likely from his abandonment.
Bruce suspected that he felt overindulged just to get a DNA sample, and meant to leave as swiftly as possible after that, as to not be a bother.
"I don't know if my DNA will hold together long enough to be tested," Danny said again, strained and frustrated. "It has… other problems, from some of the later experiments."
That was a half-truth, but Bruce quickly assessed it as a problem for later. "Understood."
"Everything's set up to be as fast as possible," Tim added, arms crossed as he watched. "If it breaks down before I can finish, we'll know it's not your fault."
Danny didn't look reassured. "And… what would you do?"
"We'll exercise our best judgment," Bruce said evenly.
It was obvious that Danny immediately interpreted that as 'we will play it safe and refuse to help you,' by the way his head dropped with a soft, resigned sigh, but Bruce meant what he said. Based on Danny's behavior in the interim, and his stated plans for how to proceed, he would make a judgment call. Calculated risks were Bruce's specialty.
From Damian's unwavering stare, he didn't agree with Bruce's metrics.
"This family is well acquainted with clones, I assure you," Alfred said, kinder than any of the rest of them. "We're well aware that it's not your fault where you came from. Unless we find evidence to the contrary, you are nothing more sinister than a child who desperately needs help."
Yes. A child who, one way or another, was related to Bruce.
"Recklessness," Damian muttered, his restless shifting giving away the extent of his unease. (Damian never was particularly fond of Kon either.)
Alfred handed the blood sample to Tim, who immediately scurried off with it and went to process the sample as quickly as the chemistry of the process would allow. In the following silence, Danny shoved his hands in his lap, seemingly attempting to pretend not to exist. It was an… odd look, for Bruce to see on his own face.
"If you receive a DNA sample, what do you intend to do with it?" Bruce asked abruptly. Danny glanced up, giving him a skeptical look.
"…Stabilize my DNA?" he suggested.
"Do you have the knowledge to do that yourself, or do you intend to return to the people who created you?" Bruce clarified. "Or do you know of another person who may be able to stabilize you?" There were more people in the world that had the relevant knowledge, plenty of whom would be pleased to have even a 'failed' clone of Batman indebted to them. Most of them weren't especially trustworthy.
Danny grimaced slightly, indicating he wasn't happy with his options either. "I know a guy," he said at last, reluctantly. "He's familiar enough with the cloning process that he can probably help. He's not great, but he won't let me die if he can stop it."
That indicated two things: that Danny was not certain this man would succeed, and that he did not like this man. "Define 'not great.'"
"Father," Damian said, exasperated. Bruce ignored him.
Gut Feeling
DPXDC
Commissioner Jim Gordon meets an odd kid in the precinct.
--
“Come on, you really don’t have a way to directly contact Batman?”
Jim smiled. Kids came to the station and asked that all the time. Usually, it was just curiosity and showing them the signal was enough to get them to sign up for the Junior Police program. This one looked a little older than most, teenagers were often “too old” to believe in Batman, but again, give them a little faith now and they’ll never loose it.
“Lookin’ for the Bat, kid?” Jim asked, knowing he was about to make this kid’s –
Jim froze. The kid turned to face him and it was Bruce Wayne. Not playboy billionaire Bruce Wayne, but freshly a teenager Bruce Wayne. The Bruce Wayne who Jim had checked in on time and again from age eight until he ran off on a globetrotting trip to find himself. The little Bruce Wayne with too pale skin and dark bags under his eyes, and not enough love to make up for all the grief weighing him down. And he didn’t look like Damian either, where Bruce was obviously his father but there were distinct traits from his mother. This was a carbon copy of a boy Jim remembered vividly.
“I am.” He even sounded like teenage Bruce. All business, like he was on a mission.
“I might be able to help you, but it’ll take a while.” Jim said and the officer the kid had been talking too gave him an odd look. He waved her off and told the kid to follow him to the commissioner’s office. Normally, he’d be more dramatic, put on more of a show for the kid, but his gut told him this was different, this was important. He offered the kid a styrofoam cup of water then closed the door behind him. “So, what do you need to talk to Batman for?”
“It’s personal. I need to talk to him in person.”
Jim took a sip of coffee from his cup. “He doesn’t appreciate me calling for no reason in the middle of the day.”
“So you do have a direct line?” The kid nearly jumped out of his seat. “If he’s upset, it’ll be my fault, just call him, please.”
“Who should I say wants to talk to him?”
The kid hesitated. “He doesn’t know me, but I have to talk to him.”
Jim frowned. “What’s your name, kid?”
He swallowed and looked like he wasn’t going to answer for a moment. “Danny.”
“Danny…?” Jim wanted a last name but Danny kept quiet. Jim sighed, “He’s likely not going to show up until sundown.”
“I can wait, as long as you guarantee he’ll show.”
“And you��re not going to tell me why you need Batman?” Jim just got a glare in response. “What about one of the other heroes?”
“Only Batman, no one else can help.”
“You sure about that? Not even Superman?”
“Not unless Superman can get me in the same room as Batman.”
“Why’s it so important that you meet him in person?”
“It’s personal.”
Jim liked this less and less by the minute. “Do your parents know you’re here?”
Danny looked away but right when it looked like he wouldn’t say anything he mumbled. “They wouldn’t care anyway.”
After another moment to give the kid time to reconsider, Jim pulled out the Bat-phone. It was a normal Wayne-Tech cell phone, but Jim had been given very specific instructions on how and when to use it. The phone listed all the Gotham Vigilantes without visible numbers so they couldn’t be copied and handed out. He pressed the one for Batman.
“Stand outside, would you?” The kid gave him a look, but followed the request. Jim could see his shadow in the door’s window, not so subtle eavesdropping.
It rang a few times, and Jim sat there awkwardly with a teenager listening to his every move. Finally, a familiar voice picked up the other end of the line. “Commissioner Gordon.”
“Sorry to call you out of the blue Batman, but I’ve got a kid here who needs your help.”
“Who?”
“Says his name is Danny, that you’ve never met him but you’re the only one who can help him.”
“Why?”
“Refuses to tell me.”
“What’s your best guess, Commissioner?”
Jim looked at Danny’s shadow, it looked like he was straining his ears to try and hear what he was saying. Danny had given him almost nothing to work with. Just his name, that he’s never met Batman but needs to talk with him in person. But Jim was here because he listened to his gut. A feeling like when you see a random rock on your neighbor’s doorstep but you’d never go in without an invitation. A feeling like you know what’s in the present and are preparing your surprised face. A feeling like when you cheated on your wife and you know she knows.
“He looks like Bruce Wayne.”
A beat of silence. “What?”
“Danny looks exactly like Bruce when he was a teenager. Exactly the same.” Jim hoped Batman would get it, feel in his gut what Jim felt.
“And he wont say why he’s there?”
“No, and he demands to see you in person.”
“I’ll be there in an hour.”
“10-4.” The line cut off before Jim had finished saying it. He called Danny in again. “He’s on his way.”
Danny glared at him. “If he’s not, if you called some social worker or something, you’ll regret it.”
“I’m sure.” Jim sighed and downed the rest of his now cold coffee.
The sun hadn’t set, but only just barely. Jim ended up taking Danny up to the roof in the end after all, if only to save his window from being broken into. The kid had a red hoodie on, but he was still shivering in the autumn chill and it was just going to get colder by the minute as the sun made its way behind the horizon.
Jim checked his watch and, at exactly an hour from when he called, he acted surprised when Batman and Robin appeared out of nowhere. “Bats.”
“Commissioner.” Batman greeted but his eyes went straight for Danny. “Danny, I assume.”
“Yeah, I…” Danny hesitated, looking at Jim and Robin.
All it took was four words from Batman. “What do you need?”
The kid held out his hand with a flash drive in it. “I’m your clone. My par- The people who made me wanted to make a stronger version of you, but they got ahead of themselves. My DNA is degrading and I’ll die if I don’t get your DNA to stabilize me.”
Holy cow.
“You don’t expect us to believe that, do you?” Robin sneered at him.
“The flash drive has all the info on it. All the data about the cloning process and the, uh, relevant experiments after that.” Batman gave the kid a look. “I didn’t want to waste time on unnecessary data.”
“If what you’re saying is true, why are you here, alone? Are they working on a different solution?”
Danny’s shoulders hiked up. “I’ve been a failure for a while now, I’m not worth the resources and they’d learn more from an autopsy.”
Oof, kid. Jim looked at Batman who seemed to feel the same… if Jim was reading him right.
“So, you wont object to a DNA test?” Robin asked with a cocky head tilt, at least he was relatively easy to read.
“You can try.” Danny said, and then realized what that sounded like. “I mean I wont stop you, but my DNA degrades faster outside my body. You’ll have to take me to whatever lab you plan on using.”
“Then we will.” Batman said and jerked his head towards where they’d probably parked that ridiculous car of his. But then he looked at Jim with a nod. “Commissioner.”
“Batman.” Jim returned the nod. “You’ll tell me how things turn out, yeah?”
“I’ll give you a report.” Batman joked – Jim could tell, it was gut feeling.
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Yellowjackets sexuality headcanons?
this might upset some people because to me they’re all some kind of queer but here we go
jackie: comphet lesbian, one thousand percent. she was down insanely bad for shauna and did not fw jeff, straight jackie believers were we watching the same show??
shauna: she’s our fucking crazy mean bisexual, she had more chemistry with pretty much every girl on her team than with jeff or adam xo plus jackieshauna.. come on yall the YEARNING
we already know van and tai are lesbians and yup fully agreed, pushing the butchfemme taivan agenda ALWAYS
misty: misty’s just down for the ride tbh, she gets obsessive over literally anyone (coach ben, later nat) so maybe pan but she’s just an unlabeled psycho queer girlie to me
nat: sigh i want her to be a lesbian so bad but she’s not completely there for me, i feel like similar to misty she could get with whoever as long as she’s having a good time, and we’ve seen her be very flirty with both men and women in the teen and adult timelines
lottie: lesbian lesbian big fat lesbian like i feel like there’s nothing to explain, fucking look at her talking to any woman (im also a huge lottienat shopper so..)
laura lee: little baby lesbian who will sadly probably never really accept that and if she didn’t die, she would grow up and marry a christian guy and have a huge family. yes that thought pains me no i don’t want to talk about it
travis (yes i included travis): crazy one but he seems so transmasc to me, don’t ask me why it just radiates
side characters because i’m nice: genlissa are dating, i don’t know what kind of gay they are but they are some kind of gay!! mari has some queer moments, especially concerning lottie, so she’s a little bi to me, and akilah gives me straight.. sorry to all the tai and akilah shippers but she just seems like a valentina kind of person to me (get the reference please) 🫶🏼 ALSO CRYSTAL IS ONE OF THEM QUEERS!! her and misty matched each others freak on more levels than one.
not including some adult timeline side characters because most of them suck 💜 thank you sm for the ask this was so fun lol
#yellowjackets#van palmer#jackie taylor#shauna shipman#natalie scatorccio#taissa turner#misty quigley#misty fucking quigley#lottie matthews#mari yellowjackets#travis martinez#genlissa#taivan#akilah yellowjackets#javi martinez#crystal yellowjackets#yellowjackets showtime#yellowjackets cast#yj#yj cast#ella purnell#sophie nelisse#liv hewson#jackieshauna#jasmin savoy brown#courtney eaton#sophie thatcher#kevin alves#alexa barajas#sammi hanratty
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Ok so... I'm too shy to come off of anon or comment on your actual fics but you are SUCH a good writer
Admittedly I'm not a fan of y/n fics or selfships, but you genuinely made me change my mind about them. I was introduced through people talking about your sleuth jesters fic, and I decided to give it a try. Boy I'm glad that I did.
The way you write is genuinely so breathtaking?? Everything you write is so authentic in a way, it almost feels real. Its been a while since I've read sleuth jesters but I remember being genuinely astounded by the way you wrote the characters and events happening. The personalities felt so unique from each other, yet worked so well both story wise and with the characters in the story too. The way you wrote the tension between the vigilante and eclipse too??? Had me freaking the HELL OUT. I absolutely loved reading that part in the story, it felt so suspenseful.
You're genuinely such an amazing writer and I wanted to say thank you for sharing your amazing stories with us. Your writing has literally changed my brain chemistry and has inspired me to get back into writing too, I aspire to be like you one day. You're probably one of my favorite writers ever tbh. I hope you have an amazing day/night<33
THANK YOU! Wow, that just makes me melt into a puddle! That's so sweet and I'm very glad you took the time to tell me so <3 Thank you so much!
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hey, I hope this is okay to ask since you’re now talking about stackie on here again.
do you have thoughts on what happened between them, like genuinely. do you think they were just friends with benefits, fell in love along the way and til this day these feelings are still there, or more? sometimes seb says these painfully sincere things about him that make it sound like he’s in love with him and sometimes he’s all snarky and says he hates him. without even too much tinhatting what do you think about them?
okay so I’m gonna lay out a range of Scenarios in decreasing likelihood/increasing tinhatting, on the agreement that we are all just foolin around thinking out some thoughts none of this is real and I do have a hold on my normal brain
1) the intense situational friendship
we’ve all been there. A workplace that puts you in constant intense contact with each other and destroys your ability to maintain normal external life while you’re in the middle of it (filming, press tour) and before you know it you’re trauma bonding over cigarettes in the back of the parking lot and swearing you’ll be bffs forever and nobody knows you like they know you
and then you quit or the film wraps or the junket is over and you make all this big noise about staying friends and catching up but inevitably your new reality begins to get in the way, plus after a year or two you can’t sustain catch ups that revolve around work gossip when you’re not in the middle of that shit anymore, and it’s not that either of you are deliberately fading out it’s just that friendships like that naturally ebb over time but u still got a soft spot for your guy your pal your best marvel bro
2) the intense situational friendship but you act a little gay about it
maybe you’re gay, maybe you’re not, some straight dudes are pretty fun about idle gay flirting for the bit, and platonic chemistry looks like flirtation from the outside anyway so you let everyone give you the side eye and keep sharing cigarettes in a way that’s a little bit too close for anyone to NOT wonder
3) the intense situational work-crush, one-sided
it’s the above but one of you is super gay about it for real not for the bit
and maybe you know or maybe you don’t, maybe the other guy knows or maybe HE don’t, as above some straight dudes will just flirt for the bit but anyway it’s more likely he doesn’t know it’s real for you or at least he’s gonna keep the facade up
so you say some weird stuff to and about each other and play it up for the interviews and it could pass for platonic chemistry but you gotta keep the yearning on lock or you wind up accidentally looking at your work friend like he’s the sun moon and stars and then you’re lying in bed that night like FUCK did I make it TOO weird
(if it was gonna be weird he wouldn’t be constantly telling you your hair is so great and touching it in a way that makes you shiver and want something you’re not ever gonna give shape to even inside your own head)
(like running his fingers through and taking hold at the nape of your neck and threatening idly to pull it for real not for jokes, and you do wonder just once before you can catch yourself, what would it be like if he followed up with a kiss or, like, setting his teeth in the side of your throat and biting down just a little)
usually it’s recoverable if you don’t admit to or talk about your feelings, it’ll pass when you’re not spending 16 hours a day in each other’s company but he’ll hug you years later at the golden globes and he’ll still smell so good and you WILL feel Something that sort of hurts but in a mostly good way
maybe years later you’ll have worked through it and gotten a secure-attachment real life boyfriend and you’ll idly refer to that big crush you had and it won’t feel like you’re choking on acid it’ll just be Haha Wow Remember That One Time When
4) the casual work friends-with-bennies
you’re both cool! you both like to kiss on the mouth and also suck a dick occasionally! you’re never gonna come out about it because it’s hollywood but it makes a film shoot a lot more fun when you can blow off some steam in your trailer
you can drop it at the end of filming and pick it back up when you get signed for a Disney plus show together and it’s fine, it’s chill, it’s a truly optimal outcome
5) the casual work friends-with-bennies but one of you caught feelings
oh bud. we’re in mess territory and you’re gonna get burned by it but you already know that and the best you can hope for is that once you’re not fucking the feelings will fade
in all honesty it’ll still burn you less than scenario 3 because an intense friendship like that takes you so much deeper into casual intimacy but on the other hand you DO know what his dick feels like halfway down your throat and let’s be real, the smart thing to do would be call it off but the sex is too good so you’re just waiting it out for the crash
and the crash is bad, obviously, you finish the press tour and go home and if you push down you can still feel the last bruise-bite but you’re back to texting once a month and hearing about each other through social media instead of in person
you’ll do it again though because you are a sucker for punishment and it’ll be just as good slash just as bad
6) the intense situational work friendship turned friends-with-bennies
[ralph wiggum voice] haha you’re in danger
and I want to tell you that you’re BOTH in danger but let’s be real, one of you is way more likely to get real feelings about it and once that happens it’s all over for you because while he’s going, yeah this is cool I like to suck a dick occasionally and I also like my good buddy so what a good combination, you’re drawing love hearts in the margins of your script and thinking about a romantic holiday to Romania
you will end filming and he will go “good game man let’s catch up next time we’re in the same city” and you will feel something catch in your heart
all I can say is that at least you entered into the fucking part of this on the basis of true friendship and the feelings didn’t arrive until after you were already fucking. it’s still not great. It’s bad. But at least there’s that.
7) intense situational work-crush (one-sided) turned friends-with-bennies
we are in the game over zone. you are not in danger you are surrounded on all sides by forest fire and there’s no way out. you have signed up for a prolonged broken heart and [radiohead voice] you did it to yourself
either you pretend forever that you did not have a crush before you started fucking and you don’t have a crush now, and you silently suffer through losing the brief joy of getting to kiss when filming ends (bad) or you admit to your feelings and your friend tells you with grace and sympathy that he does not feel the same way (worse) or you hide your feelings so poorly that you act like a total asshole and when you do eventually admit to it the entire edifice of friendship is torn down by the force of your repressed emotion (worst).
appendix: what if they both had feelings?
no I’m sorry I simply don’t think this is realistic I think AT MOST it was a love affair where one person liked the other quite a lot but the other was in it Too Deep and that was unsustainable long-term.
anyway, my only other contribution is that apparently sebstan’s current girlfriend previously dated chris pine. for four years. isn’t that interesting? chris pine, now that’s a man with some perplexingly undefinable energy. some would say, that man is a lesbian. just interesting to me that an aspiring model slash actress would date an extremely lesbian man for four years and then two months after breaking up would get together with ol sebastian, a man who was apparently spotted celebrating his 40th with said girlfriend and a passel of other pals including his long-time buddy chace crawford.
which could mean nothing, obviously. but it’s interesting. that’s all.
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OH YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE-
Okay, so if we zoom in only on the girlies. Maria Theresa of course would be the first and foremost because she's a fucking icon, hands down. One of the most important monarchs in Austrian, Hungarian, Czech etc. and of course SLOVAK history. She ruled the Habsburg monarchy for 40 years and did so many important things that I can't even give you a brief summary.
Stephanie of Belgium was a FASCINATING personality, I've only read an abridged version of her memoirs, but seeing things from her perspective was a Journey. Of course, my true blorbo is her first husband, but honestly in terms of sympathies, I feel more for her than for him. #justiceforstephanie Plus the fact that she made a better life for herself, found true love and junk after his death warms my heart.
Anne of Austria. An absolute icon who facilitated the height of absolutism (a mixed blessing to be sure, but nonetheless) by keeping France from falling apart before Louis XIV. ever came to power. Also had just... The most fascinating life, married at 13 to a notorious prude, their marriage was notoriously volatile, she participated in a bajilion conspiracies against him, then they made up for the last time and had two kids when they were in their 40s, soon thereafter he died and she had to keep France from falling apart, all the while flirting with a sexy cardinal. What can I say, I read the Slovak translation of Herrinnen des Louvre at 15 and it permanently altered my brain chemistry.
Margeurite "Margot" de Valois. Another absolutely fascinating life story of a clever woman navigating politics, plus was cancelled during her lifetime for just the dumbest reasons. If anything, her many love affairs and constant switching of sides make her even more iconic!
Fulvia, married to both Clodius Pulcher and Marcus Antonius and like a good Roman wife did her best to match their freak. One of the prime dramatis personae of the transition between Roman republic and empire and, frankly, the most underrated one. Also other Roman women, like Agrippina the Younger and of course the great Theodora of the Nika rebellion and regency for Justinian I. during his illness fame, @hurremsultanns will tell you why she's awesome.
And OF COURSE. Of course. The 18th century Romanov empresses. Were they correct? Mostly no. Were they likeable? With the exception of Catherine the Great, also mostly no (no, really, you WOULD want to hang out with her, if for no other reason than because you might run into Ekaterina Vorontsova-Dashkova). But were they iconic? Yes, absolutely, 100%.
But for real tho... In my opinion, the real test of your blorbos isn't even their choice, it's your ability to put them in a historical context. Like if you know not only tidbits from their life, but also to assess how they fit into or deviate from the norms of their era and how important they are in a broader context, then you're pretty much golden no matter what basic bitch you choose.
History is not just Marie Antoinette, it's more
I don't know about you, but there is a certain community of people in history that is starting to annoy me… I call them the "history girls" I don't know if you see but they are the girls who are only interested in Marie Antoinette, Anne Boleyn, Empress Sissi (and sometimes the Romanov sisters) it disappoints me because I have the impression that they only know that about history, what is too bad is that these historical figures are interesting I'm not saying the opposite but everyone knows them, you tell a French person to name a historical figure he necessarily says Marie Antoinette and the same for the others, history is not that, history is thousands of characters who have marked life, I prefer characters that no one knows than characters about whom there are already a slew of books and films, I prefer to talk to people whose historical figure they don't know at all, it's much more interesting and it allows better know the history precisely…personally my favorite historical figure is Marshal Michel Ney who knows him apart from those who are interested in the Napoleonic era and specialists? no one…so who are your favorite historical figures that no one knows and who are more interesting than Marie Antoinette, Anne Boleyn and Empress Sissi?
#random history#as for the boys#it's my boy rudolf#his dad#and maximilian i#i mean the holy roman emperor#what can i say#he's a veritable boyfailure#i can't not love him
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#requests#peyton x jake#jake x peyton#peyton sawyer#Jake Jagielski#bryan greenberg#hilarie burton#kiss#kisses#kissing#they did have chemistry i will give them that much#gif#gifs#gifset#2x14#oth#othedit#othedits
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they tried to rebrand as The Criminals but riz is literally the city council's treasurer and also turns out people in their late 20s don't really name their friend groups. so now they're The Intrepid Heroes
#fantasy high#figueroth faeth#kristen applebees#adaine abernant#gorgug thistlespring#fabian seacaster#riz gukgak#yes this is sorta from the same thing Ive been doing for future!riz lol. that riz is the same design basically#just the above board sona#u can kiiinda tell which of the bad kids I have a very clear vision for their future design and which I kinda wing it for lol#kristen's tank top is white and the coat is galaxy tie dye btw. I didnt have the energy to express that in ink but thats the ult version#adaine I truly imagine to grow up to be the perpetual t shirt and jeans person but she carries her sword everywhere#gorgugs truth is that shes just hot she can wear anything. but I do give him the skirt hike bc I love him#I really like skirt hike... such a fun thing to put in designs. if ur garment has no variance in how it falls or drapes u can do it urself#this is also a little bit of an exercise in how much of an accessory I can freehand from memory#fig's bass I straight up did not fact check for. just rawdogging it memory only. same with fandrangor and adaine's crocs#I did write in my funny little document that gorgug takes up baking and is good at it bc I think itd be good for him#to do basically chemistry and math that also feeds people#out of them... kristen and riz would be Good good at it. but riz would get way too stressed abt the recipe and kristen bakes by#eyeballing the texture. fabian likes decorating but refuses to get anywhere near the heat of an oven. adaine isnt good at it first try#and is like well my effort goes to other things actually. fig Loves baking and Nobody lets her into the kitchen#idk why this manifests so clear in my head. must be bc of recent foccacia events#living in the subtropics is hell for baking nobody try it ok? I tell u
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Listen i know what they built I know what they created for nandermo, and the fact that we didn't get a kiss in the main timeline can be overlooked by the Bond of nandermo and all the fucking clues about romantic involvement or at least attraction and in that I love the writing it feels natural it feels dumb like they are
But I cannot help but think the writers sort of shat all over the finale season when they could have made a queer masterpiece and now I feel like it's a way less worse klance situation all over again
It stings it hurts and the writers are fucking cowards, like what was that all for in the end what was it worth blablabla so funny haha YOU COULD HAVE DONE SOMETHING MAGICAL YOU FUCKING CUNT UNTIL THE END YOU COULDVE
It's 2024 please don't be fucking bitches
Sincerely yours, a nandermo truther until the next life,
I Am Devastated,
Good night
#nandermo canon#ill shoot anyone point blank who disagrees#i dont even give a flat fuck#nandermo#they still have xhat they have which is a fuckton of chemistry and the wink of them being a couple is clear wink to the main series and the#relationship they have#its depth and romantic matter etc#i know what they did for nandermo#i know what nandermo is#but they could have done so much more#so much better#they could have done magic#they had every fucking ingredients#i hate yall#dont speak to me#i know nandemro is canon but i woudlve liked a kiss or somey#something*#FUCK#FUUUCK#wwdits#wwdits finale#fuck them writers#as per usual
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I think one of the funniest things about the Arcane writing team is that seemingly specifically because they didn't intend to write Viktor and Jayce as romantic they accidentally developed one of the most interesting and moving queer dynamics on television, and specifically because they were so into Caitlyn and Vi they completely forgot and failed to develop literally any chemistry between them at all before we were supposed to believe they had a thing going on beyond vague interest.
#arcane#as a writer i see exactly how this happened - you were too into it and skipped all the necessary steps to get to the meat of it but it was#way too premature to be at all interesting#whereas because they weren't distracted viktor and jayce are fully realized and developed#dont get me wrong i WANTED to like caitlyn and vi really badly#caitlyn and vi's shared portraits in league have a chemistry arcane cannot seem to get their hands on#i simply do not believe they like each other nearly as much as this script expected me to#they did the work to develop a sociopolitical interest in each other with a spark of attraction#and then they just completely dropped every single thing in between that and writing them as if they're married#i would've believed a developing situationship throughout s2 where they got together towards the end with the same prison cell scene#way more than a completely offscreen relationship then breakup & makeup#they simply weren't distracted with viktor and jayce and accidentally made their partnership basically the center of this universe#developing them as strong separate characters with deep flaws and the only thing that makes up for those flaws is each other...like???#i WISH caitlyn and vi had been that neatly character driven - the structure they set up to do it was right there!!#they couldn't focus on developing character to fill in the structure!! so they turned into a hollow plot-driven husk of a relationship#it just sticks out really sorely in an otherwise super solid character driven show and it's such an easy fix just give them more TIME#not even more screen time- literally just wait to establish them as a couple until the prison scene to give them time to cook#they're about to make the same exact mistake with jinx and ekko i can feel it
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I’m late af but oh gawd Hidden Love (偷偷藏不住) is so cute I can’t stop smiling and just sweet and they love each other so so very much. Greenest flag Duan Jiaxu and the sweet yet so strong Sang Zhi 🥹
#hidden love#偷偷藏不住#the way there is COMMUNICATION!!#fighting for each other and their love#making their ways to each other and forever#Zhao Lusi can have chemistry with a rock#I love duan jiaxu sm#sang zhi and sang yan#she’s grown up with so much love and care that she radiates with it so brightly#she shows her love and concern so easily and is so brave because she knows her bro/fam has her back#she shows him care even when she pretends not to like him and expects nothing in return#he who has so little; who has so much burdens and no one; how can he not fall for her?#he who is used to caring for everyone and having no one care for him#used to putting himself second and living with the guilt of what his dad did#she gives him everything he craves for and more so easily#he gives her his everything in return#and him treating her like the most precious human being in the world#progressing in their relationship at her pace; CONSENT IS SO SEXY#taking care of her at every turn (and her him)#I love them sm ok 😭
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As someone who never really watched the old versions of tmnt (except a lil of 2012 one) let alone the crossover episodes that have usagi in em, BUT watching Rottmnt like 4-6 times and finally samurai rabbit on netflix, i’d have to say, I get it now. I understand now.
#rottmnt#samurai rabbit#leosagi#I'VE FALLEN WEAK FOR THE BUNNY TURTLE SHIP#my boys are so similar to each others it's so uncanny#plus they're just such fucking adorable idiots sometimes#AND THEY BOTH DID THE PORTAL CHOPPING THING#the cryptid talks#season 3 crossover episode whennnn??????#they give off such braggy rights#ughhhff i just love them#i have watched clips on youtube of their old crossover and just seeing those really shows much chemistry they have#i wasnt expecting this to get so many notes goddamn
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haven't watched shadowside or played 4 but ngl it feels kinda pointless for summer and tate to be nate and katie's kids when nate can't even see yo-kai anymore in it and seemingly never brings that fact up-
#puppy rambles#yo-kai watch#yw4#<- kind of#also nate and katie literally have no romantic chemistry in canon i know it was always endgame but like#why did they never actually give them anything. the crush always seems to be one-sided-#i honestly can't see them as anything more than friends and that's not just cuz of me liking other ships for them#they just. don't have any actual chemistry. nate has a crush on katie and that's literally it#there's never anything that implies katie has a crush on nate. even in the games. it's so weird#i'm sure i'd enjoy shadowside and 4 if i watched/played them but like. there's just so much weird stuff in the future era#like. whatever the fuck is going on in y-school heroes. i don't even try to figure out what that's about anymore#all i know is that future human jibanyan (jiba jinpei or something???) is apparently amy's grandson#which is neat i guess#idk i mean. there's a reason i just see the games as a trilogy#i just think it'd be more interesting if even if you do have nate not have a watch/be friends with jibbers and whisper as an adult#for him to at least bring it up??? at somepoint???#because otherwise it just feels completely useless to have summer and tate be nate's kids-#side note but i honestly don't blame people for not using the english names for shadowside characters tate is a terrible name#do you think his full name's tathan-#like. i feel like there's probably a better english name they could've used to continue the naming scheme-#but nope. tate. what kind of name is that#shadowside is so baffling to me-
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Watched the mario movie. Have a lot of thoughts.
#random thoughts#mario#nintendo#mario and luigi's bond is just not there#peach's characterization is shit#why did it seem like she'd never been to the kong kingdom before#bowser's weird obsession with peach was. misguided.#luigi had way too little screentime and was literally just there to give mario motive#WHY IS BOWSER'S KINGDOM LIKE THAT???????#why is peach from another world she is literally a toadstool#THE MUSHROOM KINGDOM AND BROOKLYN FUSED HELLO???????#why did they never show the effects of that#there was no reason to change their backstory just have them be flushed down the toilet with the dog#toad fucks i love him#luma is MY FAVORITE why are they like that#MARIO AND DONKEY KONG HAD WAYYY TOO MUCH CHEMISTRY#why did they show that map in the beginning if they're only gonna explore three worlds#why did they spend so much time on the obstacle course if their mission was time sensitive#why didn't everyone in brooklyn freak the fuck out about the giant turtle#why did they have the audio slow down every time they said mama mia#LOVED the orchestra#overall it was fine!!! 6/10 maybe
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older bf! cheol (+18 mdni)
warnings: just me projecting my daddy issues. SMUT. unprotected sex 😭, fingering and oral (f rec), praising (f rec), daddy cheol. 🫦, creampie, sub!reader, dom!cheol
older bf!cheol who’s the most dependable man in your life. he wants you to count on him completely and he’s proven to be reliable time after time.
older bf!cheol loves taking care of you — loves babying you til the end of time. often cooks for you, buys you food all the time, his number one priority is always to make sure his baby is well fed.
older bf!cheol who’s THE epitome of: yes, i know you can, but let me (!!!!!!) knows you like to prove yourself as a strong and independent woman (which u r) but he wants to do everything for you nonetheless.
older bf!cheol who loves being your number one supporter; he’s always there for whatever important event you have going on — ALWAYS. he’s standing there tall and proud, with a fresh bouquet of your favourite flowers.
older bf!cheol who always leaves his card with you. wants to spoil you. takes pride in being able to spoil his princess rotten — you deserve the whole world and he will, in fact, do everything in his power to give you the world.
older bf!cheol who loves telling you how proud he is of you all the time. no matter what you’ve accomplished, he will be sure that you KNOW that.
he’ll have you seated prettily on his lap, while he hugs you, kisses your hands, down to your knuckles, and your fingertips — “you did so well baby, i’m so proud of you.” he would mutter while gazing at you with overflowing love, lips still puckering on your knuckles.
to say that had an effect on you would be an understatement. you melted like putty under his gaze, his gentle and subtle touches that felt like fire on your skin.
“you are?” the girl who was so desperately seeking for approval surfaced at that moment, and seungcheol is more than happy to go on about how happy he is for you — and how he is so proud of you, in awe of you.
“can i show you baby? how proud daddy is of you,”
you nod eagerly, already slipping into that light headspace, wanting nothing but to be praised by cheol, and to have him take care of you.
“words baby, have you forgotten? no words no reward,” cheol runs his index finger down your lips, pausing at your bottom lip to swipe his thumb over gently. his eyes hooded and dripping with raw lust as he observes the way you squirm on his lap.
“yes….daddy, show me…please,” your quiet whimpers and words altered his brain chemistry at that very moment. he loves you so much and wants nothing but to let you feel exactly how much he adores you.
older bf!cheol loves fucking you on every surface of the house, but right now, he wants to have you laid out on the bed bare for him. princess carries you to your shared bedroom. removes every article of clothing for you — leaving kisses at every area he exposes.
he swears his soul levitates every time he sees how gorgeous you look — especially when you’re looking up at him with those innocent eyes of yours. but he knows better than to think of you as innocent. knows you’re his dirty little angel.
knows you’re itching to have his cock in your mouth, like the obedient slut you always are to him. but tonight it’s all about you — and he’s going to make sure his pretty baby gets what she deserves.
“tell daddy what you need from him angel.” he urges you, hands rubbing across your thighs gently. “hmm?” he hums, head tilted and you’re about to cum for him right then and there.
“want to feel you daddy, your touch your mouth. want it all,” you breath out. he taps on your inner thigh and you immediately spread your legs wide open, propping them up on the bed for him.
“my smart little girl. you listen to daddy so well, don’t need me to remind you anymore hm?” cheol teases your cunt with his finger tip, running them across your wet hole — gushing out more slick every second — and he gathers the slick, rubs them all over your cunt.
“i’m daddy’s smart little girl—nngghh,” you push your hips up a little at his touch, enjoying his undivided attention on you.
“that you are, baby,” he dives down to give kitten licks and kisses around your clit, before going for the main course, flicking his tongue — playing with the growing bundle of nerves. he uses his tongue to spread your juices even more, before pushing his muscle deep inside your cunt and he moans at how warm your cunt feels.
“ohh..daddy, feels so good,” you moan out, hands reaching out to comb through his scalp before grabbing onto his locks.
cheol gets off praises as much as you do. so when he hears how much you’re enjoying him savouring your cunt, he goes harder, determined to outperform himself every time. he keeps his lips suctioned on your clit as his tongue moves ferociously around it. long fingers of his automatically making their way inside your warm cunt.
he pushes in slowly, enjoying the feeling of your textured walls swallowing him in bit by bit. groans around your clit as he realises how easily your pretty little cunt has managed to take two of his fingers.
he starts to massage those walls, eliciting a cry out of you. you tug on his hair harder as you feel him hitting your g-spot the more he pushes those thick fingers in.
“fuck daddy, take it daddy take it, pussy’s all yours,” you cry out, pleasure administered on both points making you lose control as you feel your thighs start to tremble.
“yeah baby, s’all mine. my smart little baby.”
“think you can cum for me baby? cum for your daddy hmm?” he pants as he starts to suck on your clit with urgency, wanting to feel you cum around his fingers.
“i’m right thereee daddy — gonna cum for you, gonna cum,” you cut yourself off as you feel your core start to twitch. letting out the final cry as you cum around cheol’s fingers.
“that’s it baby, so so good for me,”
cheol decides he’s too impatient and wants to pound you into the mattress right after making you cum. wants to see your pretty face as he makes you cum around his cock this time.
“gonna fuck you like you deserve now baby,” he slaps his thick cock on your sensitive cunt a few times. you jerk at the touch, too sensitive yet feeling insatiable.
he slides the tip in, and immediately groans as he gets reminded by how warm and tight your little cunt is. just like you, obedient and perfect. it sucks his cock in and refuses to let it go as he bottoms out.
“so—so big daddy. i love your cock so much,” you cry out, hands grabbing his wrists that are positioned on the sides of your head. his head hangs right above yours, lips bruised from all the lip biting he’s been doing. loves looking right into your eyes as he fucks you.
“fuck baby. you feel incredibly fucking good, can’t even describe it — ah fuck,” he feels your cunt clenching. doesn’t understand how a soaking wet cunt manages to grip onto his cock so tight.
“my little baby, so pretty under daddy. being filled with daddy’s huge cock.” he starts to move, pulls out his cock till the tip is left in you, before slamming it deep inside your cunt in an instant. the sounds you let out are pornographic to say the least, but cheol loves it. loves that he’s the only one that’ll ever make you feel this way.
“my smart smart baby, daddy’s so proud of you. you know that?” he tells you so softly as he holds onto your cheek so tenderly, yet his thrusts continue to get faster and rougher as his hips work like a machine.
you nod, only being able to let out hiccups of tears every time you open your mouth. loves when cheol is being a moving juxtaposition like this. so soft to you on the lips yet fucking you like he fucking means it.
“mm ‘course you knew that, my angel. you always make me proud. always are so so good. s’why you always deserve the best don’t you,” he pants out, moans at the way your cunt is gripping onto him for dear life each time he sends praises towards you.
“thank you daddy. thank you thank you,” you don’t know who or what is wiring your conscious mind right now as you get railed by your boyfriend. you’re stuck in that state of pleasure and cheol fogs up your entire mind, your entire being in the moment.
“the best girl. best angel. always the best for daddy, fuck. i love you baby,” cheol feels himself coming to a close. the thought of you is enough to drive him to the end point. and with your cunt pulsing around him like it’s about to explode anytime soon too, he knows he’s done for.
“daddyy, gonna make me cum again. can i — ngggh — cum again daddy,” you’re always so polite no matter when, it drives him crazy how you’re always his good girl.
“such a good girllll baby, yes you can cum fuck — cum for daddy yeah? gonna make daddy cum too,” he reaches out and in his usual fashion, draws tight figures around your clit to push you over the edge.
it works every time — and now your spasming around him as you feel your orgasm crashing and taking over your entire being. it feels catastrophic, yet heavenly as you cum around cheol’s cock.
“that’s it baby — cumming all over my cock like daddy’s good girl. good fucking girl,” he grunts out a guttural moan, and feels himself fall over as well.
lips on your neck as he spills his hot and thick load of creamy cum inside you. it spills and it spills till it starts to spill out of your cunt. you sigh happily as you feel your cunt so full with his warm load.
“best reward ever daddy,”
older bf!cheol starts to kiss you all over, telling you how good you did for him. he cleans you up, prepares your favourite ramen in minutes after helping you wash up.
older bf!cheol who always looks forward to this part of the day — where he gets to unwind with you, and talk about each other’s days.
need cheol so bad. need him to fix me. hah! anyways! i hope this was okay <3 feel free to comment or rb w/ any feedback if you liked it!! 🍒 muah love u guys ❤️🩹
perm taglist 🖤: @gyuguys @black-swan-blog27 @do-you-remember-summer-127 @mrsjohnnysuh
#seungcheol smut#seungcheol fluff#seungcheol headcanons#seungcheol drabbles#seungcheol imagines#seungcheol fic#seungcheol x reader#seungcheol fics#seventeen smut#scoups smut#scoups x reader#scoups headcanons#scoups imagines#seventeen drabbles
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Worlds Collide - Lando Norris x neuropsychologist!Reader
SUMMARY: You're a fresh neuropsychologist who is internet-famous for making entertaining and educational videos about anything psychology-related. Lando and you meet for the first time when the two of you are invited to do an episode on a podcast where people from very different professions sit down together and talk about their lives. Considering the instant chemistry, the fans aren't exactly surprised when the dating rumours emerge...
worldscollide_pod tagged landonorris and yn_thebrainiac in a post:
What do a neuropsychologist and a Formula 1 driver have in common? 🧠🏎️ We don't know either! So we invited landonorris and yn_thebrainiac to tell us about their lives.
Listen to Worlds Collide wherever you get your podcasts or watch the episode on our YouTube channel. You can suggest and vote on show guests on our Patron page.
Comments:
user1: i'd say they have brain injury in common??
user2: not the crossover episode we wanted but the one we needed
user3: he's driving fast, she's a failed med student, what's interesting about that?
↳ user4: omg please be a joke 😭 or a ragebait ↳ user5: user3 do you realize how much time and effort it takes to be either a f1 driver or a neuropsychologist? ↳ user5: high school dropout ass comment
landonorris: can't wait!
↳ yn_thebrainiac: looking forward to meeting you ❤️ liked by landonorris
user6: he called a rectangle a circle and she uses Latin names for brain parts like it's common knowledge. Truly a collision of worlds lmao
user7: these two in one room?? feels like a fever dream
↳ user8: more like a new Barbie movie
worldscollide_pod tagged landonorris and yn_thebrainiac in a post:
This week on Worlds Collide we have learned that a pit stop is kinda like a therapy appointment, helmets are humanity's best invention and waffles are to your brain what fuel is to a car.
Huge thanks to landonorris and yn_thebrainiac for giving us insight into their exceptional careers as well as two hours of good laughs!
Listen to Worlds Collide wherever you get your podcasts or watch the episode on our YouTube channel. You can suggest and vote on show guests on our Patron page.
Comments:
user9: yn_thebrainiac is the only person to get excited over brain injuries
↳ user10: and landonorris is the only person to make heart eyes while someone is talking about brain injuries
user11: when yn_thebrainiac was explaining her job and said to Lando he should hope he never has to be examined by her he looked so defeated 😭😭 truly a wet cat
↳ user12: and the "I guess I won't wear a helmet anymore"?? bro is down bad from the start
yn_thebrainiac: thank you for the opportunity! landonorris it was great meeting you ❤️ hope to see you again soon liked by landonorris and worldscollide_pod
↳ landonorris: just let me know when and where 🏃♂️🏃♂️
user13: landonorris is that guy who suddenly becomes a comedian whenever a pretty girl is around
↳ user14: but it DID work on yn_thebrainiac 😭😭😭
user15: not yn_thebrainiac answering questions like it's a presidential debate and Lando going idk man I just drive
user16: Lando asking the hosts to repeat the question because he was too focused on yn_thebrainiac? man's not beating the simp allegations anytime soon
user17: that whole episode felt more like a date than a talk show liked by worldscollide_pod
↳ worldscollide_pod: were we more wingmen or a third wheel?
user18: the way both of them were invested in each other's stories made me realize how utterly single I am
↳ user19: when yn_thebrainiac said it's a force of habit to ask how something made him feel and then Lando casually asking her the same thing??? delete Tinder, no dating app will get you a man like this
user20: can I just say how surprised I am with Lando's thoughtfulness? Like when yn_thebrainiac said she's scared to drive after examining an accident victim and he immediately offered to be her driver?
↳ user21: considering the tales of Lando's driving, it will only traumatise her further lol
user22: Lando telling her to continue because he wants to hear the rest of the story when she apologized for getting sidetracked??? 🥺🥺 mom, I want this one!!!!!
user23: they just met and they have more chemistry than some couples who have been married for decades
↳ user24: if Lando was staring at me the way he's staring at yn_thebrainiac I'd be radioactive 📛☢️ ↳ user25: no but really girlies if he doesn't look at you the way Lando's looking at her, he's not the one 🏃♀️➡��❌
user26: now I kinda want yn_thebrainiac to take up Lando on his offer to test his cognitive skills
↳ user27: if they're in the same room he's going to fail every attention task
user28: Lando's dolphin ass giggle would make you think yn_thebrainiac is the funniest person on Earth
↳ user29: he's just a girl 🎀🎀
user30: I became a fan the moment yn_thebrainiac said "imagine your head is a hairy watermelon with a ball of jello inside"
↳ user31: as a med student I can tell you that it's pretty accurate
gossipgirl_f1 just posted a picture:
🚨🚨🚨McLaren's most eligible bachelor landonorris not eligible anymore? 🚨🚨🚨The driver has been spotted in Japan getting comfortable with an unnamed girl.
user32: didn't yn_thebrainiac post she's there too?
↳ user33: oh god please let it be real ↳ user34: it's definitely her
user35: people out there living my dreams 🥲
user36: why do yall even care?? he's a grown ass man, grow tf up
↳ user37: and yet here you are commenting 😴😴 like what are YOU doing at the devils sacrament?
user38: where's the FBI when you need them we have to knowww
↳ user39: that's yn_thebrainiac she had the exact same outfit in the story she posted earlier
user40: come look girl user41 someones stealing your man
↳ user41: aw hell naw she better know how to fight ↳ user42: wow the delulu is strong with this one
user43: look what yall did worldscollide_pod liked by worldscollide_pod
↳ user43: i guess that's a confirmation huh
landonorris tagged yn_thebrainiac in a post:
Japan treated us nice but she treats me nicer 🌸🇯🇵
Comments:
user44: so they met and fell in love because they were randomly invited to do a random episode of a random podcast? and people still say God ain't real smdh
↳ user45: they better not forget to invite worldscollide_pod to their wedding
user46: guess he'll fuck anyone, when's my turn?
↳ user47: probably never, considering you're no one rather than anyone💁♀️💁♀️
oscarpiastri: yes, they are as annoyingly in love as they look
↳ landonorris: woww and here I thought we were best friends ↳ landonorris: so rude ↳ oscarpiastri: I have group chat screenshots ↳ landonorris: you're my bestest friend Oscar and you're too nice to ever do this to me 🥰 ↳ maxverstappen1: we all have screenshots ↳ georgerussell63: you're cooked mate ↳ landonorris: 🥲🥲
user48: I would sacrifice my firstborn for this 😭😭
user49: I'm not sure who I am more jealous of
↳ user50: both
user51: they look so good together wtf
user52: worldscollide_pod you guys need to fix your post, what neuropsychologist and a f1 driver have in common is a marriage certificate
user53: ok real question how did he pull her??
↳ user54: he's a millionaire he doesn't have to do anything lol women's ideal type is a loaded wallet ↳ user55: bold of you to assume someone like her needs a walking piggy bank
yn_thebrainiac tagged landonorris in a post:
Hey, did you know that it was a Japanese scholar, Hiroshi Kojima, who popularized phenomenological ontology? He proposed that the dichotomy of individuality vs consciousness could be solved by treating the body as a half-way point between those two concepts. In essence, Kojima suggested considering the body as being seen both from the inside and the outside, now focusing on the intersubjective encounters as part of what constitutes the human being in the context of ontology.
Ps. He promised to wear his helmet! 🌼💖
Comments:
user56: she's everything, he's just Ken😌💅liked by landonorris
↳ georgerussell63: facts
user57: I bet the pillow talk is baffling
↳ landonorris: nah she's too tired for that ↳ user58: 💀💀 bro you didn't have to do her like that
user59: if he breaks your heart I promise to shake his head real hard, repeatedly 🥰🥰
user60: 😬😬 do they not make them pretty anymore?
↳ user61: fr she doesn't deserve him 😐 sad ↳ user62: this relationship feels like a social experiment like what do you mean he chose HER???? Lando Norris settling for a 2/10 is not the news I wanted to read today ↳ user63: wow no wonder yall dads left 😭 she's a normal looking woman, did porn rot your peanut brains completely? go outside and interact with regular, non-photoshopped people and then come back
user64: they have nothing in common and yet they fit perfectly how?? i feel like I'm having a strokee
user65: diagnostic process videos bout to get lit now that there's a volunteer to draw clocks and memorize strings of random words
user66: why do they look like a disney movie couple
↳ maxverstappen1: he may or may not have called her princess on more than one occasion ↳ landonorris: you guys promised 🥲 ↳ oscarpiastri: no, we promised not to post the screenshots ↳ yn_thebrainiac: you mean the screenshots georgerussell63 just sent me? ↳ landonorris: good talk everyone I'll just go die of embarrassment if you don't mind ↳ yn_thebrainiac: I thought the things you said about me were kind of cute ↳ landonorris: nvm I'm back to life
#f1#f1 fanfiction#f1 imagine#f1 x you#f1 x reader#f1 fanfic#formula one#formula 1 smau#formula 1 social media#formula one smau#lando norris#lando norris x reader#lando norris fanfic#lando x reader#lando norris imagine#ln4#lando norris fanfiction#ln4 x reader#ln4 fanfic#ln4 x you#ln4 imagine#ln4 fluff#ln4 fic
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litmus test | s.r.
in which Spencer needs your expertise to help solve a murder, but crime fighting is most decidedly not for you
find more chemist!reader here!
who? spencer reid x chemist!reader category: flangst (like. the end is a little angsty and it has case details) content warnings: typical cm violence, science talk, fem!reader, reader is not built for crime, morgan being an older brother, some fun banter!! death by firework is crazy lmao word count: 1.68k a/n: this is one of my favorite fluff pieces i've written in agessss i missed chemist!reader so much i learn so many things when i'm writing her. this was a request! i hope you like it as much as i do!!
“Do you have a second?” Spencer asks, his voice slightly choppy over the phone. Between his ancient phone and being inside concrete police precincts, some disconnect was bound to happen.
Saving your document to your computer, you rest the lab phone between your shoulder and ear, “If you’re asking me if I have any corrosive chemicals in my hands, the answer is no.”
He chuckles lightly, “I never know with you.”
You roll your eyes in response, even if he can’t see you, “It was one time and I needed a new phone case anyway.”
“You fused the plastic of your phone case to the material of your phone,” he retorts far too quickly for your liking.
“Yes,” you acquiesce, “but I know the exact chemical reaction that caused that phenomenon.” You cross your legs one over the other, maintaining your balance on your lab stool as you speak to Spencer over the phone.
He gave a light hum in response, “Speaking of chemical reactions – I need your help.”
Your eyebrows shot up in surprise, “You’re asking me for help in chemistry?” There really was a first time for everything, you suppose.
Spencer was more than capable of navigating a lab on his own, even so, he admits, “You have more applied practice than I do.”
Pursing your lips, you nod to yourself, “Fair enough. What’s stumping you, Dr. Reid?” Your inquiry, while innocent enough, garners a wolf whistle from your graduate assistant.
“There’s something burning a hole in these bones, and I’m not sure what would be causing it to happen this fast,” he explains, giving you minor background information on how long the bones were out and if the medical examiner had treated them with something.
You clear your throat, frowning at the notes you had scrawled down in front of you, “Burning or corroding?” What was seemingly a meaningless distinction would actually allow you to filter through approximately half of the possibilities.
“Corroding,” he corrects himself, “My mistake.”
Crossing off some of your notes, you purse your lips at the new possibilities, “No worries. Did you try flushing it out with water?”
You hear papers flipping on his end of the call before you get a response, “That would destroy evidence.”
“Well,” you raise your eyebrows, “It sounds like your evidence is destroying itself.”
“Baby,” Spencer says in a no-nonsense tone reserved for when he was deep in a case. You could’ve sworn you heard Morgan in the background of the call mocking him for the pet name.
Turning back to your notes, you sigh, “Yeah, yeah, all work and no play. Was the body buried?”
“Partially,” his reply intrigues you, “I can have Garcia send you the crime scene photos if you think it’ll help.”
Wrinkling your nose at the thought, you made an unsure sound, “Right, because nothing says lunchtime like getting up close and personal with a homicide victim.”
“What lunchtime? It’s three pm in D.C. right now,” he caught you, a slight chiding tone in his words.
Ignoring his questions, you ask more of your own, “Was the body near water? Did they test the pH of the soil and water?”
There were more papers flipping, likely someone presenting the results of those tests to him, “Yeah, the soil was a five-point two and the water was a seven-point eight,” he listed off for you.
While your knowledge of the pH of the soil in Iowa was limited, you did know that those levels were pretty on par for the northern Mississippi River. “O-kay,” you say, extending your vowels, “and they didn’t find anything else on the scene that points to corrosive materials. Hydrofluoric acid?” You posit, “No, you know what – maybe you should send me those files. My work email is encrypted, you can give it to Penelope.”
He speaks to someone else in the room with him and you resist the urge to ask him if he’s enjoying Iowa, “It’s sent,” he confirms with you.
Pulling up your email only takes a moment, and once you get over the initial shock of seeing a dead body on your computer screen, you lift your lab glasses to the top of your head in order to get a better look. “I mean,” you think for a moment, “those look like alkali burns to me. I’ve never seen them on bones before, but you should do a litmus test to check either way.”
“So, we rinse it with water?” He asks, seeking instruction from you in a way that makes you feel oddly powerful.
Your eyes widen, “No, no, no. If it’s a metal compound then it’ll be covered in a mineral oil, so rinsing it with water would actually make the burn worse.”
Pausing for a moment, you consider the possibility that Spencer didn’t have the luxury of time – he was trying to solve a murder, not do experiments in a lab.
“Alkali burns can be serious, it all depends on what caused them, and most are helped by rinsing with water. So, unless you have the time to test for metal compounds, I’d go ahead and rinse it. You might want to brush the damage to the bones with a dry brush first. If there’s lime on the bones it’ll foam, which not only will corrode the bones even further but it might release a toxic gas,” you have no idea how the corrosion would interact with bone marrow, but something tell you that you don’t want to know
“Wait a minute,” Derek interjects, being included in the conversation now that Spencer put the call on speaker, “I thought things like alkaline water were good for you.”
You scoff instinctively, “Oh, there’s no definitive evidence that shows alkaline water as having any real health benefits. Especially not the benefits that the internet says it has.” Straightening up in your stool, you continue, “In fact, there is evidence from the NIH that says drinking alkaline water could cause kidney damage. There’s a particular-“
“My bad,” he interjects, effectively stopping your rambling before it really took off, “I forgot whose girlfriend I was talking to.”
Groaning at your new vexation, you huff, “Oh, fuck off, Derek. Go kick down a door.”
Spencer quickly switches the phone back, “Thank you, angel.”
Squinting at the photos that were still on your laptop screen, a crude, disturbing thought came to mind, “You know, sparklers can cause alkali burns. It might be something to consider because of the diameter of the burns.”
Your boyfriend was silent on his end of the call for so long that you had to check and make sure the call hadn't dropped. “Did you say sparklers?”
“Yep,” you confirm, “like the ones you can get everywhere this time of year.”
He says something to Morgan, placing his hand over the receiver so you can’t hear, “There’s only one spot in this town, though. I’ve gotta go, see you soon.”
“Stay safe, please! I prefer your bones unburned,” you rattle off into the phone before it clicks, placing the phone back on the stand and deleting the crime scene photos from your inbox.
The front door to the apartment opens and shuts quietly, with Spencer under the assumption that you already went to bed, he was surprised to find you on the couch, nursing a cup of tea. “Hey, baby,” he chirps, unusually peppy for this time of night.
“Hey,” you say half-heartedly, threading your fingers through the handle of the mug.
Your somber tone gets Spencer’s attention, “What’s wrong?”
The slight panic in his voice causes your eyes to snap up to his, “Nothing,” you murmur. “It’s just… the woman who was in those pictures. There- the burns on her bones, they were signs of torture, weren’t they?”
You’d been thinking about the burns ever since Spencer showed them to you, “Yes,” he answers with a reciprocating softness, sitting down next to you on the couch. “The medical examiner concluded that she was burned antemortem.”
That woman had been burned alive by fireworks, sparklers had seared their way through skin and muscle until it finally met her bones. You blink a few tears from your eyes at the thought, “I like my lab, Spence.”
The confusion on his face was palpable, “I know you do.”
“I like my minimal human interaction and my chemicals, and I like knowing why certain things cause certain reactions. I like it when things make sense.” You take a deep, shaky breath, “Killing someone. Torturing someone with fireworks. That just doesn’t make sense to me.”
You had no interest in hearing the excuses that the killer had provided. You had no interest in hearing the psychological breakdown of that woman’s killer. Spencer knows that, “The photos got to you?”
Taking a sip from your mug, you nod solemnly, “I can’t stop thinking about the way it must have felt. Oh, the smell must have been horrible. That poor woman.” In theory, it was a ridiculous notion, killing someone with fireworks seemed neither probable nor possible. Yet here you are.
“But we got the person who killed her,” Spencer reassures you, resting his hand gently on your knee. “We couldn’t have done it without you,” he adds.
Your face warms at his compliment, “I wish I could have helped before she was killed.” You were grateful that Spencer hadn’t passed on any personal information about the woman, it was easier for you if you kept things in separate storage files in your mind.
Spencer hums, reaching out and sweeping a strand of hair behind your ear, “There’s always going to be another one. I’m sorry about the photos, I should’ve made sure Garcia only sent the necessary ones.”
Nodding absentmindedly, you look at him thoughtfully, “This will pass, but for tonight I just feel bad for the victim.”
“I can have Penelope share some of her favorite baby animal videos, if you’d like,” he offers softly, resting his head on your shoulder.
In return, you give him a small smile, “Well, I suppose it really can’t hurt.”
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